Windows To The Soul


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📓
class
journal
💭
type
art thoughts
✏️
status
in-progress

09-01-2026 at 04:26 pm


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Why Eyes?

As I created Eyed, I reflected on my fascination with eyes in a conversation with my husband. I think eyes represent a lot for me, namely: being seen, being watched, focus, and attention.

Being Seen

Being understood has been a major contributor to who I decide to keep in my life. We are all complex beings and I need a lot of understanding when it comes to my eccentricities. I don’t want to constantly mask myself, I want to be around people who truly see me.

Eyes represent being seen and validated.

Being Watched

Social anxiety is something I struggle with, and I constantly feel like I’m being judged. I overthink every interaction and worry that I come across as weird instead of quirky or goofy. Other people’s perceptions impact me, even though they probably shouldn’t.

Eyes represent my fear of constantly being monitored and judged.

Focus

As I stated earlier, I tend to externalize my thoughts, feelings, dreams, memories, experiences, etc because I worry that if I don’t, I will lose them/forget them. One common ADHD symptom is a lack of object permanence. It’s why we lose things so easily. Once it’s out of our physical sight, it’s GONE. This includes people, appointments, even things we like doing. Out of sight? Out of mind. It why a lot of us are so cluttered…because we like having out stuff around us to remind us it exists. I need to focus on what’s in front of me in order to progress.

Eyes represent object permanence.

Attention

ADHD is a misnomer, because it isn’t a deficient of attention that’s the problem. The problem is a dysregulation of attention. People with ADHD have infinite attention…for the things they are interested in. So I have a particularly rough relationship with attention, having ADHD myself. It’s why art has taken me so long to practice and actually get good at.

Eyes represent the metaphorical strain it takes to focus my attention on specific things.

Unsettled/Creepy

This was an addition from the Feel Bad Make Good entry:

08/14/26

Another breakthrough as I was ruminating about why I like drawing eyes so much. I’ve known for a bit that they represent attention, focus, and perception. But I realized today that I also like the fact that they creep people out, and the reason I like to creep people out is because I want them to feel uncomfortable just like how uncomfortable I am having to deal with the world with ADHD and mental illness.

I’ve also known that my confetti doodles represent the confusion of ADHD. And putting this together what I just realized above…my art (in general) seeks to have the viewer experience the same emotions I experience. Things like overwhelm, confusion, perception, anxiety, discomfort, uncanny, creepy come up a lot in my art, and I think this fall right in line with that.

Eye Art History

This is the oldest drawing I have of me practicing a full human eye. I followed a tutorial and was so pleased with the results. I drew this in 2013.

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However, a lesson I haven’t learned very well is to stop while I’m ahead. I ended up adding color and felt like I’d ruined it. This mean that blurry picture above is the only picture I have of the beauty that was my first attempt at a human eye.

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After that, I did eyes and faces every now-and-then. The below spans 2-3 years.

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Something I’ve noticed about my eyes is that when I do draw them on faces, they are quite large…much larger than they should be proportionally. I think I like large eyes because they remind me of alien eyes, and also because I just like drawing eyes.

Eye Advancements

While in my digital experimentation era in 2019, I found another really cool tutorial on how to digitally paint irises. It was easy to follow and helped me creating stunning images.

Tutorial 1 (Rainbow Eye)
Tutorial 2 (Purple Eye)

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And then, one of my more recent pieces, a favorite of mine, is this eye with the doodled iris.

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I’ve also began experimenting with animal eyes. Most animals don’t have scleras so they’re just irises in the face. The irises are the most interesting part of animal eyes and are something I want to explore more so when I do color studies, more so than pencil sketches.

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My brother said he really liked the eye in particular in the above fish piece.

Random Eye Tips